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antiparticle ([personal profile] antiparticle) wrote2017-04-08 02:40 am

lesbian wedding nightmarez

I rarely dream about weddings, but when I do, I'm on the verge of same-sex marriage with a stranger and there's some disaster occurring. I've never recalled a dream about marrying any partner I've been with or anyone I know IRL.

There was one dream a couple years ago where I was marrying this awesome lady named Laura. My awful mom burst into the venue and tried to interrupt the proceedings with a bigoted religious rant, but Laura stood up for us and said some brilliant things that totally shut down awful mom. I was still in contact with mom at the time I had the dream, and I thought nothing of it, but in hindsight, my dream life was giving me heavy foreshadowing. Now I reflect on the dream and realize I have the power within my own mind to act against bigotry, but since I rarely speak up for myself, my imagination invented my bride Laura to speak for me/us.

My most recent dream was different: no awful bigotry was involved, but there were more subtle disturbances. I was wearing a floofy white strapless wedding dress (totally not my style, I felt uncomfortable and hot and needed to pee) and a pair of kick-ass silver boots which I own IRL. My fiancee was a petite Asian-American woman wearing a similar elegant wedding dress and her own kick-ass boots. We were about to marry in a luxurious B&B we'd rented for the occasion, and my brother and his partner were attending, along with a few other childhood friends, all wearing outfits with kick-ass boots. My bride-to-be started panicking about having forgotten rings for the ceremony, so we went on the hunt for my jewelry box to look for rings. There was a big mess of stuff in our room at the B&B and my jewelry box was hidden (and open) underneath some gross wet towels, making our wedding jewelry all wet and sticky. I realized that I didn't even know the name of my soon-to-be wife, I felt pressured into the marriage, I hated wearing an uncomfortable floofy dress, and I was pissed about the mess in our room. I woke up at that point and was glad it was a dream.

I'm hoping to sleep better tonight and wake up in time for the first hot yoga class of the day... enough of nightmarez, time to live and breathe into my healing.